Brash and confident off the batt. But let me explain.

In a setting like this, with you on that side and me on this side, I feel at peace. I still feel connected to you, but I find comfort in sitting here in the security of my lounge room, wearing a loose bedtime shirt and comfy pants, not dressed up in a public setting, void of feeling the expectation of others around me.

I’ve lost count as to the amount of times I’ve been asked “Is everything ok?” or “What’s wrong?” Nothing is wrong. Infact, most of the time, I’m smiling on the inside, completely content and feeling love for all people around me. It’s just that the 43 muscles in my face won’t tell you that. They are too busy staying neutral, not because I dont care, but because I’m happy just being quite and avoiding any signalling. I certainly don’t think I’m better than you. I’m not a bastard or bitch even though my pokerface may project another story. But asking me an introvert to change is like me asking you to sit still, be quite and read a book when all you want to do is party.

Maybe you’re like me and find it exhausting to have to maintain energy in a group setting, especially when you don’t know anyone in the group. Networking events are work in-and-of-themselves because you have to level up your personality and energy just to be present. And it’s not that you don’t care, we do care, in fact we often care quite a lot, but it doesn’t take away from the fact that it’s tiring.

But gives us a book, some headphones, a secluded spot to eat lunch, a solo project or a piece of work that requires a high level of attention to detail, often quite complex in nature, and we thrive!

Me, in my element, alone. This is called ‘recharging’ so I can get back to giving back.

There’s no question introverts have superpowers that others don’t. We excel at self directed work. We can identify problems and challenges others cannot because we are often removed from the noise that is everyone else’s surroundings. We see everything. Our comfort in ourself yeilds high levels of self awareness which in turn means many of us are exceptionally in tune with the emotions of others. We are great listeners, largely because we avoid speaking and thus have ears trained to pay attention to someone other than ourselves. We can often work on tasks needing acute attention for long periods when left alone to do so. This is because our energy is deployed to our environment in small increments to which we carefully control. We see things others don’t because we are always looking. We hear things others don’t because we are always listening. And we know how others are feeling because we have high levels of spatial and emotional awareness.

Yes, we introverts get drained at the thought of being in a densely populated room with very low social optionality, but we sure as shit make up for it in many other ways. Our superpowers don’t let us down. And they too can avoid letting you down if you’re an extrovert. You just have to know how to include and introvert – it’s simple – just let us be. We will work the rest out.

Are you an introvert or extrovert? Or somewhere in between?

Ivan.

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