Recently I received a comment that I must have very good organisational skills to juggle all the hats I wear with running my business, having a new baby with the wifey, helping to raise a very bright and energetic 3 year old, juggling it between shift work in the “job” and maintaining a blog.
Having pondered on the comment for sometime I came to the realisation that there is a very significant aspect in all of this that allows it all to happen relatively smoothly while still keeping a strong and loving marriage and tightly bonded family. This key aspect is not in my own ability to do anything extraordinary on my own. In fact, doing it on my own would probably be a massive challenge that would take some learning from single parents, my hat off to them.
Here lies the truth. In a relationship involving a busy schedule, a family and a busy work/business life it is crucial that there is a strong sense of team work between you and your partner.
This one factor plays such a big part in my beautiful wife and I’s relationship. When it’s bath time for the kids there is one of us bathing and another ready to take over when dressing needs to happen. When dinner is being served there is someone plating up the food while the other is setting the table. When the table is being cleared, another is changing a nappy. When one of us is sitting down to read our son a book, the other is making tea/coffee ready for “our time”. When someone is getting a bag packed ready for school, another is making breakfast. There is a balance in our relationship that we try to keep for mutual support in everything that we do. Without it we would be doomed to the darkest swallows of the deepest valleys. Ok, not quite that doomed, but you get the picture.
Here are my top 5 tips to build a strong sense of team work in your marriage for the best productivity in everything you do:
- Both be clear about expectations. There is no point one person expecting something in a relationship, especially when it comes to running a family when the other has no idea what needs to happen and when. It simply does not work. And it will not help your family life, or your work/business life.
- Have an open line of communication. This is one of the most commonly voiced suggestions for a healthy and happy marriage yet it is one of the most under-addopted principles leading to marriage/family breakdowns. If you haven’t got communication down pat before you tie the knot then you better be sure to work on it from today. Assuming you truly love your husband/wife then I would assume you married your better half for more reasons than one, including trust. Loving your partner with your soul and respecting them includes having faith in their ability to respect your voice. Take down the barriers to communication in your relationship. When you talk to each other, listen. Look into each others eyes, no distractions and talk.
- Take time to “date” each other. Remember when you first fell in love. What did you do with each other that gave you that fuzzy feeling? That excitement to see them early in the morning and not part with each other late into the night. Those moments need to be lived throughout your marriage. It is incredible how much it keeps your relationship strong and in any team effort a strong relationship within the unit is imperative. For more great tips on building a strong relationship see this post I wrote for you.
- Don’t be lazy. If you expect your husband/wife to do all the work while you sit and do squat then your headed for disaster. Re-read tip number 1.
- Give your better half the credit they deserve. It is so important to show your appreciation. And it is equally important to show your lover that your committed to helping when needed and practical. For the men out there… WANT to help your wife/girlfriend. Give it a go while being genuine about it. Often our women just want us to actually want to help and not complain about it. More often than not if you have work to do and your supportive to her when she needs it she will be happy to take over for a bit as long as you were genuine in the first place.
There it is. Now live happily ever after :)
I’d love to hear from you! What is your best tip that keeps your family strong while you run your business/work? What do you find to be the biggest challenge? Leave me a comment or if you’re shy send me an email to firstname.lastname@example.org and I’ll see if I can help.